Separate fact from fiction: Live a healthy relationship
"In common parlance, a myth is an 'old wives' tale,' a generally accepted belief unsubstantiated by fact."
--David Adams Leeming, The World of Myth (3)
So what does this quote have to do with where you are currently in your relationship?
To me the quote really underlines the point that myths are just common held beliefs that haven’t been challenged.
In terms of intimate relationships, if certain beliefs are held about intimate relationships then this can be quite detrimental to the relationship and any new relationship you find yourself in. Myths are expectations and these expectations are assumptions. And assumptions are the termites of relationships. Why? Because they will eat away at you and your relationship, leaving resentment in its place.
I have seen a lot of couples go into their marriage with incredible expectations and then get sorely disappointed and with no hope that the relationship will work. Even when they split up, these myths still come back to haunt them if they don’t challenge them. By challenging these myths you can start to change the way you think and how you feel about the other person. To find out what these dangerous myths are click here.
Let me give you an example of a very common held belief that I have seen so many people use “If my ex or partner changes, then I will be much happier and our relationship would work.” This is a trap that I too have fallen into, but it’s not true.
Firstly, happiness does not come from the outside, it only comes from within and how we perceive and think. Secondly, expecting your ex or partner to change is futile. Nobody will change unless they want to. Even those who want to find it challenging as it does take resources, time and effort. Generally we are not wired that way. What happens when you find them not changing? You get angry, frustrated or disappointed? And then in some instances you could start thinking “This is probably not the right relationship for me. If they really loved me they would change. They don’t understand me.”
So what can you do? You can challenge these beliefs by downloading my myth buster report and clicking here
Marina Pearson
